Wednesday, February 19, 2014

My friend's hilarious response to my PMS Poem

This morning I got this amazing email from my friend Anna in response to my last post. Oh Anna, you are the best, this is hilarious!

Some days you wake up hating the world...
"BUT I WUV YOU!" - the World

Some days you tell your boyfriend to leave you alone, but then call him a jerk for ignoring you.
Ah, mixed messages. We all send them:

Some days making eye contact with another human being feels like a great achievement.
"Just lean forward a little bit mooooreee......"

Some days you feel left out but you don't want to join in.
You can come join our circle--we sit together but we never talk!

Some days you wish this was acceptable behavior for adults:
It totally is, just show your adult wisdom and maturity by putting this down on the floor first!

Some days you understand why God flooded the earth.
This little girl is in sympathy with you:

Some days you wonder why God saved Noah.
"Isn't it obvious? I'm extremely handsome."

Some days looking at your Facebook feed feels like reading 101 reasons why you suck.
Don't listen to the feed!

Some days the sound of laughter makes you want to hurt someone.
I'll join you in smacking this guy down!

Some days you wonder how there can be so much peace in the world since this is the fifth person you've wanted to hurt all morning.
But that is all there is--there are actually only five annoying people in the world! You've reached the limit!!

Some days you look up flights to Australia.
Don't go there--its far away from here! And dangerous! look at this succinct summary of their national history:

Some days your bladder hurts because you won't get out of bed to pee.
Ah...well...there are options!

Some days you know you are spoiled and ungrateful because you are grumpy. So then you get grumpier.

Some days you cuddle with your old stuffed animal because it's the only thing that understands you.
"Understand I do."

Some days you sacrilegiously sing "Were you there when they crucified my Lord" just because it's the saddest song you can think of.
The obvious solution is to go sacrilegious in a hilarious direction by watching this again!

Some days a friend smiles at you and you turn away to cry because it feels like the nicest thing anyone has ever done for you.
Like this?

Some days you daydream about ways to break your arm so that you don't have to go to work - if you fell from your two-story window you could probably break it without killing yourself.
But if you bling your sling, then you can still go to work!

Some days you forget that the bad mood you isn't the real you.
Its not you!

Some days writing a Pissy PMS Poem makes you feel a little bit better.
And some days your friend hopes that their PMS poem supplement will also make you laugh.

Love you, friend!!!!!!!

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